30 July 2015

posted in:

Talking Addiction

Whenever a potential client contacts me and uses the a-word, I can trust in a couple of things: 1) that this person is coming to terms with something that they must feel very uncomfortable speaking about openly, and 2) that the a-word potentially carries many other words along with it–fear, shame, perhaps self-loathing.

Talking openly about addiction is hard. For anyone.

I tend to prefer using the word compulsion rather than addiction. Why? Perhaps it’s because society often treats addiction as a disease, some biomedical poltergeist that possesses us. Compulsion describes a central action–a client feels a compulsive need to drink alcohol, or use opiates, or put themselves in unhealthy sexual situations. It’s no wonder no one wants to talk about this sort of activity if it feels like we are admitting to being infected by a virus.

There are often deeper reasons for compulsive behaviour. Reasons which, for some clients, reach as far back as their family upbringing. Often times certain words rise to the surface when a client is discussing their compulsive behaviour–words like control, and enough.

“If only I had more control over my life.”

“If only I were thin enough.”

I encourage anyone wrestling with compulsive behaviour to speak with someone they feel comfortable with. Although everyone’s experience of life is different, generally speaking the first step is to feel that you are not alone, and perhaps the second step is to feel that you are understood by someone else. Therapists are good at this.