9 February 2013
Should I See A Male Or Female Therapist?
I was recently preparing a presentation for men who are training to become registered massage therapists – men being, until recently, a minority in a profession largely staffed by women. The idea was to discuss societal gender stigmas and the myths which arise from them (one, for example, being that “men are better at deep tissue massage than women” – not true).
Here are my thoughts on the matter, when it comes to choosing a psychotherapist:
First: There are always going to be personal preferences. Given the potentially long-term and intimate nature of the profession, if a client seeking a psychotherapist prefers the company of a man or a woman to seek help from, whatever that selection is based on is not mine to judge. From where I stand, for anyone seeking help, the freedom of having that choice is sacred. For some clients, being able to to make that choice is an important first step.
Second: There are some public misconceptions about male vs female abilities in a therapeutic environment which mirror the “deep tissue” myth mentioned above. Though personalities between therapists are unique, with some therapists being more empathetic or insight-driven than others, it’s important to note that competency in their chosen field is just as crucial.
If you are interested in learning more about my services, about me, or perhaps booking an appointment, please call me at 416-873-7828 or email me at info@downtowntherapy.ca for more information.
filed under: choice• general info• men• psychotherapy• women
25 January 2013
My Friend Needs A Therapist – Will You Contact Them?
Short answer: I can’t.
Longer answer: this question has been asked many times and in various forms (exchange “friend” for “wife”, “husband”, “child”), and each time I’ve been unable to accommodate the request. Why? Part of seeing a therapist is the idea of will and choice – the will to investigate something which we feel is bothering us, and the choice of whom to see for this service. If I were to go ahead and contact someone at the behest of a friend or relative, I would be imposing myself u
pon that choice and that will (symbolically at least).
Even if someone I contacted ended up never-minding my intrusion (and their friend’s intervention) and became a regular client, that initial lack of choice and will would probably linger in the therapeutic space. It could prove disruptive to the extreme, especially as they become more and more attuned to their situation.
So, no, sadly I cannot contact your friend, no matter how much they may need to talk to someone. That person needs to take the first step, because it’s a very important one.
If you are interested in learning more about my services, about me, or perhaps booking an appointment, please call me at 416-873-7828 or email me at info@downtowntherapy.ca for more information.
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