3 July 2013
About Failure
How we respond to personal disappointment often reflects the character of the individual. People who have perfectionist tendencies and those who were raised to believe that success is defined by what one does (as opposed to, say, how one lives their life) often react to personal disappointment more severely than others: the pain is personal and is hard to objectify (that is, brush off as something that is not part of the individual).
I would like to share the following link – interviews with seven prominent writers about their experience with failure: their own, that of others.
Aside from being a psychotherapist, I’m a writer. You do not have to be a writer to empathize with what the individuals in this Guardian article have to say on the matter. I think there is enough of the universal in their experience to help everyone put their personal experience with disappointment into perspective.
If you are interested in learning more about my services, about me, or perhaps booking an appointment, please call me at 416-873-7828 or email me at info@downtowntherapy.ca for more information.
filed under: art• artists on depression• failure
29 May 2013
What Do People Mean By “Resilience” As An Outcome Of Therapy?
It’s becoming a bit of a pop star in the academic and scientific world, the word “resilience”. But what does it mean when it’s used (say, like “empathy”) within the context of psychotherapy?
Let me give you a scenario…
You suffer from a general (though intermittent) anxiety revolving around things in your environment that are not within your control (think: a hornet buzzing around you on a patio, an untended tea kettle whistling in your neighbour’s kitchen). You find a therapist you feel comfortable with and for the next while you begin to explore what happens to you under these circumstances. You follow emotional threads which lead to your past. You are eventually able to delve into unresolved disturbances in your history, and perhaps how those events reverberated up to the present (not like a train track, but more like a spider’s web).
Throughout this process, the theme of “control” happens to re-occur, in various guises. The more time you spend seeing your therapist, the less chaotic and more real your life events begin to feel. Whereas you may have previously felt like a victim (even though you never self-identified as such), you begin to feel yourself moving away from that depiction. Your sense of self is clearer. You and your behaviours no longer seem to be strangers to one another. Eventually you find yourself sitting on a patio one day. A hornet lands on your glass. You watch it. It flies away, and you notice that you aren’t exhibiting the anxiety you used to. You no longer feel trapped in those moments. As a result you feel a lot better about your self and your sense of control.
That is an example of resilience.
If you are interested in learning more about my services, about me, or perhaps booking an appointment, please call me at 416-873-7828 or email me at info@downtowntherapy.ca for more information.
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